Why you should always aim high where men are concerned.

2009 is now well underway and so far, so good! I am still on track in terms of focus, determination and studiously avoiding all things of an emotionally-charged, relationship-type slant. And the good news is that I'm not even having to try; it's like 2008 Debsy has well and truly left the building......or maybe that should be pre-2009 Debsy.

For a whole host of reasons I've decided that this will be my last entry in this blog. I'm going to carry on writing, but this blog is now too visible and public to the point when I have to be careful what I write, and there ain't no fun in that ;-)

I don't know if I ever really engaged before with this relaxed, pragmatic and self-sufficient girl before, but I really like her and I've decided she should stay. She is the girl I always said I was, but deep down I still yearned for approval from everyone except myself. She lives life in 3D and she isn't afraid to look over the edge of the cliff.

And all this necessitates a look at where my life is heading, and the parameters that must pre-exist to make the journey viable.

The numero uno parameter......no relationships with men of even the slightest emotional nature (that would be in respect of "maybe we might get married one day....", not as in "he's a good pal, we should go out and get trolleyed") Because I have now decided that I will under no circumstances get married again. In fact, as things stand today, I doubt I will ever co-habit again. But I do like having male friends, even though that can get a bit tetchy sometimes.

Of course I do realise people will conjecture that by saying "I'll never get married again" the seal of fate is fairly and squarely on me walking down the aisle one last time. But those words I just typed........ well, let's just say there's more chance of me being selected for the 2012 Olympics than shopping for a trousseau again.

One thing that is certain is that when I do take the plunge again, there will be no compromising at all (I should qualify that by "take the plunge", I mean dating exclusively) And especially no compromising in terms of how he treats me.

There's no easy way to say this folks, I have been treated pretty abysmally in my relationships, and 2008 was a vintage year. But of course, I allowed it to happen so no-one else to blame on that one. For so long I have struggled to reconcile the fact that I've been emotionally kicked to the floor more times than I care to remember, but now I've managed it.

Now I realise that once you are self-sufficient in every area of your life that matters and you treat yourself with respect, you won't take being dicked around by man, vegetable or mineral.

Of course, I can talk in such grandiose tones because I'm sat in front of the most beautiful new iMac that, quite frankly, I love more than any bloke I may have chanced upon.

Together I know we can conquer the world, and then I can have my Audi TT.

So the moral of this story is that as women, we should always aim high where men are concerned.

A Red Arrows pilot is good, as long as he is single and the squadron leader.

A plastic surgeon performing miracle work on disfigured children from war-torn and third world countries. Nice.

A leading human rights barrister who champions the underdog to the end, putting morals and ethics before everything. Swoon.

Or simply men who aren't threatened by us, who don't attempt to manipulate and who love us for who we are.

Actually, option 4 sounds the best now I've read through them again. The first three sound like they'd have ego issues ;-)

That's me done. All that's left to say is:

Love unconditionally, live each day to the full and be utterly fabulous xxx